Not Good, People, NOT GOOD!

I'm mega snowed in. Going home for Christmas?

It started snowing at 3:30pm today. It's now 11:40 and we have a good 4 to 6 inches. Yeah that might not seem like a lot, but it doesn't seem like it's going to lighten up anytime soon... and may I point out that it's flippin' seattle! We got snow last year. We're only suppose to see it like every 10 years!

Hopefully my Mom can come get me either tomorrow or Monday. This is putting a BIG damper on the "visiting friends when they come into town" thing. Ashley... I haven't seen you in over two years? I don't remember it's been that long. Erin... yeah, I just miss you. Denise and Andrew... you're here til 29th. I'm hoping this junk will stop by then. Then, Matty... :(.

Oh, please stop snowing!

9 days later...

It's been snowing. I got up about 9am and it was snowing. It finally stopped about an hour ago. I love the snow. It's looks pretty. But, it gets old after awhile. I love my job. I love the people... I need human contact. Sorry Chloe. You can only keep me company for so long. She sleeps all day anyways.

Whatsa been happenin'?
~Mom's Nutcracker Thanksgiving weekend. Sister's Nutcracker the next weekend. A lot of nutcracking going on... Yes, terrible joke.
~ Chloe ate a caterpillar. She was puking for a couple days. Took her to the vet, they did some stuff, and I took home one angry cat. Found out he lost 2 1/2 lbs in 6 months!
~ Work at Disney on Monday for the first time since Thanksgiving. Lets not think about what's going to happen in a couple weeks, kay?
~ Hung out with Matty several times last week. He's in Spokane for a few days. Coming back for a few days. Going back to Spokane for a few more days. Coming back here for a few days... until he leaves for India for a couple of months. Are we jealous?
~ Went to an absolutely beautiful Christmas Concert with Danielle at her church Saturday night. My favorite was the Ensemble choir. They were the advance choir that even the director was apart of. Everyone else had their binders to read from, but she was so good, she didn't need one! Naturally she stood out. It was too bad she lost her voice by the last song.
~ The next day was my church's children Christmas program. They were so cute! I'll forever remember them singing "GO! Tell it on the Mountain"
~ After church, I went home, baked browns with crushed candy canes sprinkled on top, then headed off to my church group's Christmas party. Very fun times. We played this game:
You have a piece of paper,
1. Write a boys name, fold the paper back so no one can read it, and pass to the next person
2. Write a girls name, fold and pass.
3. Write what they are doing, keeping it appropriate, fold and pass.
4. Write where they are, fold and pass.
5. Write a line of what the boys said....
6. Write a line of what the girl said...
7. Then Write a conclusion...
Now put them in a hat/bag, mix them up, have everyone draw one, and read.
I don't remember the rest of the story, but I married Bill Clinton. Ew. I'm trying not to go on a political rant, though...
~ Tutoring: we're getting a new networking system. I've been allowed to participate in the training, and that requires me to listen in on a conference call Tuesday mornings at 8:30am. I love feeling important. :)
~ Also, work was canceled yesterday, today, and probably the rest of the week due to this snow. I can appreciate it for right now, since I've had a list of about 20 things I need to do before Christmas. And it's nice to relax for the first time since September. Ha. However I'll be ready to get back to life on Saturday, because I get to go ICE SKATING! I'm excited and I'm hoping I can go. :)

Whew. I hope I didn't forget anything, and if I did, oh well. I can post about it later. :)

Ha. Some of you might enjoy this.

"Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit."

Christmas

My favorite Christmas songs are "The First Noel" and "O Holy Night". What are yours?

"That was total wicked."

Sitting at home... watching the Incredibles. It's on TV. :) It's been a long but good week. Worked for Disney today... black friday. Oh boy. Actually it wasn't that busy. They sent me home early. I'm sad that I wasn't behind the register today. I'm also worried because they are cutting people already. This doesn't seem good to me, especially since I don't have a solid shift next week.

Thanksgiving was good. Got to play with my nephew. That's the best part to the holidays... I mean for the last year and a half. :) Might be heading to the parents, for the 3rd time this week, tomorrow. It's Nutcracker weekend. I should be a supportive daughter since I am free tomorrow night, right? Ha... yeah, right. We'll see how tired I am tomorrow.

"Life is not a comfort zone." ~ Me

Disney

Worked til 12:30 last night. Only supposed to work until 11pm. It was that crazy and the store was beyond messy. One manager, scheduled for 8 hours, worked 9 1/2 hours. Another co-worker, scheduled for 5 hours, worked I believe 8 1/2 hours. We usually only make 8,000, and we made 12,000. Whew, what a day.

I have a questions for my friends

I see a counselor, most of you know that. We were talking about abuse and I had asked the question, "is it common for people who are abused become guy/lesbian?" She said, "No, that's very rare. Studies show that people who are guy or lesbian were born that way." Studies? How can this be proven? It is my understanding that God created Man for Woman and Woman for Man. What do you all think this?

I am now in a place that I can look back on my life and see all the good that has been brought to me. One thing, it UCF. I've learned a lot about life and I've made a lot of wonderful, life-long friends through UCF. One is one of the coolest people in the world. Greg DiLoreto. I met with him today, and you should all be jealous of me. He bought me Trabant, best Chai place, and chatted for 2 hours. I always come a way feeling encouraged emotionally and spiritually. God has truly blessed me, and many others, through him. I know others would agree.

I'm annoyed and frustrated. I just want to scream.

Spanish

I'm up at 6:45, took my shower, then turned on the tube to watch while I eat. As it is no surprise, there is nothing on, so I went to the channel that where there is a woman teaching very elementary Spanish. I've reviewed colors, which there are a couple I had forgotten, numbers, and few school supplies. I feel so smart. :P

Now I'm off to a Disney meeting and will be around amazingly cheerful people. Good thing I'm getting coffee!

Andrew Hill to me: "You're a bad person."

Me: "Yeah, I am a bad person."

Him: "I'm a bad person."

I did not confirm that...

Ad

So I saw an ad on the back of a car tonight asking:

"Would you like to be a pinup girl?"

Um. No... thanks for asking?

This election is stressing me out... It shouldn't be, because I was unable to vote. I'm just passionate about some issues that were passed and denied in WA and even some other states.

Oh my

Quote:

Me: "Okay, whip it out."
Matty: "I'm not whipping anything out!"

I was talking about his MP3 player. My bad for not specifying.

One of those days you laugh at life

I decided to fall on concrete today. Erin and I were walking through a neighborhood after getting coffee. At one point the sidewalk was uneven, and I stepped wrong and down I went. At first I thought I was going to cry, then I started laughing out of embarrassment. A lady, apparently, also walking in the neighborhood came over and said, "I saw the incident and wanted to make sure you were okay." I laughed even harder. I got up and thanked her for stopping by, and continued to laugh as we parted ways with her. Erin said, "Welcome to my world..." :P

Conversation with Andrew tonight:
Me: "yeah, I'm watching my nephew on Saturday. Not sure if you'd like him though because all he does is eats, squawks, points, and poops."
Andrew: "congratulations Becky, you just described a parakeet."
Me laughing...
Andrew: "And I do hope he becomes more complicated than that."

Brief Update

Started Disney. Haven't gotten to the fun stuff yet, but I'm still excited.

Tutoring is great. Everybody is awesome. We all, supervisors and experienced tutors, got together today to help Jeanne out with some stuff. It was so much fun.

Making some new friends. Had a game night with the church folks. Good times with a bunch of laughs.

And, Erin is in town! I hope to see her on Monday or Weds or Thurs? I should call her, since I know my schedule now. Ha.

"Back off Satan"

Why is it we want what we can't or shouldn't have? My answer... Satan knows how to tug on our strings and well, human beings are just stubborn. Satan is trying to have his way with me right now... tugging on some strings that I didn't even know I had. It's really, really hard, and it really sucks. Thank goodness that we have a loving, gracious God though. I don't know where I would be without him. I need to stay focused on him and his plans for me.

Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

oh my. I woke up with morning with half my fitted sheet off. What was I dreaming about?

Jonah

This is my bunny Jonah. He was given to me for my birthday. A friend of mine (Jen's oldest sister) breeds bunnies and thought that I would want one. He is a netherland dwarf, and apparently, is show quality. Not sure I'll go that far with him, but he certainly is cute. Very curious little bunny. Chloe loves him. :P When he hops and twitches around, she goes after him. I don't think she would actually harm him, but I won't leave them alone together... at least not until he gets bigger.

Post for Denise

I saw a cop on a bicycle the other day. :)

Where has Becky been?

I think the last I left off is I house sat for the Ritzmann's. It was great. Spending time with the biggest, cutest black lab ever. What more can you ask for?

Irritation of that week: My car. I've had a leakage problem for about a month. I took it in to see what the heck it was. I was told the evaporator for the AC broke. The part itself costs about $100, but being that it's a labor intensive procedure, it cost about $1700. You gotta love cars. So, I had my mom's car for a few days. She has a toyota forerunner. As apposed to my ford focus, I felt rather powerful. People stayed out of my way. :) It was nice.

Work: This past week, my supervisor was on vacation, so I was in charge. It was great. I got several calls from Donna, Kent center's supervisor. She was checking up on me, making sure I was doing alright. I was cute. :) "If you need anything don't be afraid to call. Here's my cell phone #..." "You're doing a good job. Carol loves you!" Beka, the educational advisor... I had call her, because someone wanted to add another day and I was unsure if I was allowed to work the schedule. She said, "Becky, that's your job. You're doing just fine." Haha. Keith came in on Thursday to go through the binders with me, and he said pretty much confirmed all these validations. It's nice to know that I'm doing my job right. Especially since I love it. :)

Other work: You all know, I am now a Disney Castmember (sales associate). I'M SO EXCITED! Holy cow. I've been wanting to be one, again, for about 2 years now. The funny story about this... I was still in there computer system as working at the northgate location. Northgate is closed and had closed when I last work there. One would think they would close out my file when the store closed. I guess not. So it's been a waiting process of when I'm going to start. It'll hopefully be Monday or Tuesday of this week.

Church: Is awesome. I've joined Connects, the young adult group. The main thing is the Bible study on Sunday mornings. They also have a couple different activities throughout the month... last night a movie night. We watch National Treasure 2. Great movie. The latest thing is I'm going to join a small group (core) on Wednesday nights. Were going to be studing Joshua. I'm excited because I haven't studied the OT too much.

There's a few other things that, when I get the chance, I'll write about. It's been a long week and I'm tired, so I'll have to get back to you on them. But a preview:
1. I have a (live) bunny named Jonah. I may be allergic too him though...
2. Hard decisions and Obedience to God.
3. And of course, there's the updates on all the above.
~ I'm sure there are more... They will come to me later.

I need to update... I'll get around to it someday. :P

Actually, I may have sometime tonight. I need to run some errands first.

"Be careful because he won't" is pretty much the best advice I've ever received. It's saved me from a lot of pain this past month or whenever it was given to me. That and my friends, of course. :) I need to talk to the friend who gave this advice to me more often.

Annoyance:
So I went to the Zoo today with Jen and had a blast. I took a lot of pictures that maybe I'll get around to posting some of them someday. The annoyance, my camera pretty much has a 3 hour battery life. I had to buy batteries at the Zoo, and by the time we were ending our trek, they were dead. We were there for about 4 to 5 hours... the camera going on and off the whole time. I was unable to get the last few animals that I wanted to get. That, and my feet were badly hurting.

Birthday Week

My birthday started last monday. Danielle had asked me to do pottery painting. She gave me a gift certificate for Paint the Town in the U-village last year for my birthday. Well it expired on my birthday this year, so she thought we should use it. Good idea. :)

Wednesday was my birthday. I got up and had a doctors appointment. What fun. I then headed to the mall for a pedicure. :) It was lovely... getting pampered for 45 mins. I then dinked around the mall for a couple hours until I had to pick up Matty at his school he was working at. From there we headed to Kenmore lanes and met up with Danielle and Jen P in hopes to play a couple games of bowling. We ended up only playing one game because we got there at 5pm and league started at 6:30pm. I was happy that Jen and Cam Patrick stopped by for a couple mins, so I could see them before they headed out for Austrilla the next day. After bowling, we all headed to Northgate mall and met up with others to have dinner at Red Robin. It was very yummy. :) Lastly, a couple of us headed back to my apt to play a game of Disney Scene It. So yes Denise, I used 2 of your birthday presents on my birthday. :)

Thursday, I headed home and did a small birthday celebration with my parents. Friday I went out to lunch with them, and then went out to dinner with my friends. Saturday, I hung out with my friend Nicole. We went out to lunch/dinner and hung out at her house.

Sunday, haha... I had my first princess party ever, at least that I could remember. It was awesome. I was sharing a birthday party with a 4 year old also named Becky, who is Jen P neice. I got a Cinderella balloon and an awesome princess, barbie cake... it's hard to explain... but it was awesome, and yummy.

There ends my birthday celebration. It was a good week. :)

YAY!

Work just keeps getting better. Yesterday, all the important people had a meeting: Keith, the center supervisors, and Beka. I guess it was announced yesterday that I was the lead tutor at Highlands Renton, because when I walked in Downtown Renton today Jeneane (the supervisor there) said, "So I heard you were the Lead tutor at Highlands." Haha, so I guess it's official now.

I'm also going to be working at Downtown Renton on Saturdays now. That's about 5 hours. 9:30 to about 2:30, give or take. I'll get off early enough and still have time to play. :)

I had one girl today who didn't like me. I was helping her with subtraction with borrowing. She didn't like me helping her because after a while she started covering up her work with her hand. I was just trying to help... especially since she's having problems with it. I guess she'll have to keep doing subtraction (because we don't move them on until they master whatever skill they are working on, in this case subtraction) until she humbles herself enough to accept help or she figures out technique that works for her with subtraction... which, may I point out, is part of our job to help her figure out?

I had another girl that brought in a math quiz that she bombed. She's 9th or 10th grade taking an algebra class. I found out that I did not forget the math I learned in HS or Jr College, about 7 to 10 years ago. I was happy about that and happy to help her. :) Math is one of the best subjects ever.

I'm going to try to go the the singles group tomorrow at church, then it's off to Jen's for a day of fun.

One of my students in 10th grade that I'm helping with math...

Me: "How are you doing in your math class?"
Him: "Good. I'm probably the smartest kid in my class."

Another student, 3rd grade...

Me: "How was your day at school?"
Him: "I don't want to talk about it."

News

First a quote by my mom, "My eyes are bigger when I'm skinnier."

My news... At work, I guess we could say, I was promoted. I'm now considered the "Lead tutor" at the center I work at. This means I'll get to do more stuff... write prescriptions (the student's track for our program), be able to answer questions rather than deferring them to Carol (my supervisor) or Beka (an important person... does a lot of PR), writing and tweaking the schedule... and the main thing, at the beginning of Oct, the center will be mine for a week because Carol will be out of town. I'm excited. :) We'll see if this power stick, because Keith (the owner of Knowledge Points, my boss, my friend... Andrew Ritzmann's daddy) wants me to work on site at First Place (a school in south Seattle). Though, Carol wants me to stay at the center. They are fighting over me. :) If I have a say in it, I want to stay at the center because I have a couple students that I'm working with that I don't want to give up.

Work is pretty much wonderful.

I get to house sit for the Ritzmann's (yes, my boss and his wife) on Sept 22nd through 24th. I get to spend a couple of days with the biggest, adorable-est black lab ever. Apparently, he's still adjusting to Denise and Andrew being gone... so am I. We can adjust together. :) Being at the Ritzmann's house will make my commute to work easier. Take off about a half an hour. The commute gets old after a while. Though with that said... I will not be moving to Renton, for another 10 months anyway.

My next update will be about my birthday week.

Kid and more Kids

This weekend was very fun. I went to the parents again. My intention was to help a friend pack and clean her house. That plan was changed when my sister decided that her and her family were going to spend the night at our parents house. I was sad that I didn't get to see my friends off, but it was fun seeing Gavyn. He's very busy, being 18months old. He's also very loud... haha. My mom said that we were just as busy, but we weren't as loud. IMO, my sister lets him get away with more than he should... but I'm not a parent, nor have I ever been a parent.

To above is a picture of my nephew. He's pretty much the cutest baby I've ever met. Though there are a few who fall close to second. He is sticking out his tough. :P And his shirt says, "I get my good looks from my dad".

After they left, I went over to my friend Amy's house. Her house was very fun and busy. Firstly, about my friend Amy. She has cerebral palsy. It's severe to the point where she is confined to a wheel chair and is unable to use her arms and legs. However, she's mentally alert (she's on her way to writing her own novel) and is able to communicate to people who know her well. I can ask her yes or no questions, and she can say "eye" for yes, and "o" for no. There's things she can do with her mouth to indicate whether she's hungry or thirsty. She also uses her head to point where she wants to... there are various other things she does to help her communicate. I've known Amy since her and I were 6 or 7, and IMO, I've always been a loyal friend to her. As you might imagine, she was made fun of a lot. She also struggled with people thinking and calling stupid, retarded, etc. I have never thought such things, and I've even stood up for her in many instances. Here's a picture of her. I think she is very beautiful.

Anyway, her house was fun. Amy's sister was visiting from Wenatchee with her husband and 5 children. Yes, 5. They are named Jen and Scott, and their children: Nolan 9, Emma 7, Mia 5, Titus 3, and Nadia, turning 1 in 9 days. Jen and Scott are awesome. They want me to come visit them. Nolan is... well 9. Doing 9 year old boy things. Computers, etc. Good kid. Emma's a good kid too. Didn't get to spend much time with her though. Mia was hilarious. She would quiz me on stuff. "What were her parent's names? What were all the kid's names? How old where they?... How did I know all of it!? Did I hold so-in-so when they were a baby? Did I hold Nadia... when not 5 mins before she asked, I was holding her..." Yes, she was fun. :) Titus was also fun. He had a race car that if you shook it up then put it on the floor, it was race across the floor. We played that game for probably a half an hour. He would repeat himself a lot. He's cute. :) And Nadia. She's so cute. (Not as cute as Gavyn :P) She's crawling, but not very fast. Barely standing. Pretty verbal. Yeah, very cute. :)

Monday, I was invited to go with the whole family to Port Townsand. There we ate lunch, walked around the small town, browsing in and out of shops. Then, Nolan, Emma and Mia went to the beach with Scott, while Amy, Mrs T, Mr T, Jen, Nadia, Titus and I stayed back at one of the play areas and watched Titus play around while us girl chatted it up. Mr T was being a good citizen and picked up trash. We headed back to their house... Played around, ate dinner, and assist Amy on the computer, until I decided I should leave to go back to Seattle... I had an appointment at 11am on Tuesday.

To make this post even longer, I'm going to tell you a little bit about Mr T, Amy's dad. He's pretty awesome. Pretty much every time I come over, I get a car wash. This time... see I've been missing a hub cap (front passenger side) for about 2 years now. He's been telling me to tell my dad to get one for me. I've told my dad many times, but he's always forgotten. I love my dad. :) Anyway, Mr. T, apparently getting more frustrated about it than I, just ups and buys one for me. Didn't tell me about it. Just puts it on for me to find... whenever... which was when I got back to Seattle. He also checked my oil and made sure all my lights were working. A personal mechanic? I think he does all these random acts of kindness in appreciation to me for being such a good friend to Amy.

I have other news, but it'll have to wait until another post. :)

2 in one week

Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I've been pretty busy. Let see, there's been: work, monk night, interviews, more work, church, bridal shower, appointments, more work, wedding, driving to my parents, movie night, driving back to Seattle, going away party, more work, and hanging out with friends... I think that about covers the past two weeks.

Couple things to highlight.

~ I love work. It's so rewarding to be involved helping children advance in their education. I help kids learn how to read, which is really encouraging to me because I've always struggled with reading. My favorite is helping kids with Math. I've actually had to brush up on some skills though. I'm learning to gage whether a child needs to go up or down a level in a specific skill, or if they need extra help. I'm feeling more comfortable and my supervisor seems to be pretty happy with me... because she tells me. :) Anyway, tutoring is not for everyone, but I love it.

~ A good friend and old roommate got married this past weekend (wow that seems so long ago...). She met her husband online, who is from Australia, and they are now currently living in Australia. They plan to come to the states in the future, but don't know the time frame.

~ Lastly, I have two sets of friends moving away this week. One set left today... very good friends of mine. Out of all my friends that I've had to say goodbye to, they were the hardest. I'm handing it better than I thought, though. It helps to remember that I'm very happy for them and their new adventure.
Second set, I've only became friends with the this past year. That doesn't make it any less hard, though. This family is very giving and willing to help out anyone who needs it. We were at a mutual friends house and I started having an asthma attack. Jackie busted out her nebulizer and told me to use it. Yeah, I'll miss them too.

We'll that's it for now. I need to head off to bed because I work tomorrow... though I don't think I have any students. Sad.

New layout... wanted a change. Change is good. And I added a picture. The picture was taken from one of my favorite days, spending time with one of my favorite friends. Haha. If you ever need a retreat from life, Deception Pass is the place to go. :)

Allergies suck. That's all.

Woohoo!

Eight Gold Medals for Michael Phelps! What a record.

I was looking at his bio information, and he's 23...

Scramble Squares

I am now the master of Scramble Squares. :)

I have 3 different puzzles and there's one at work. I've done all four in under an hour. Really, all it takes is patiences.

(Though apparently, after I posted this, I looked at the website and they have an online game challenge that they only give you 5 mins to solve the puzzle...)

My fortune cookie today... "A friend will soon reveal an exciting secret to you!" Already happened. :) Maybe there is some truth to these.

Trampolining is a sport?

Meant to add this to my post yesterday... after my interview, I went to Gavyn's classroom to hang out with him a bit. As I walked in, he started staring at me. After he decided he did know me, he came over and gave me a hug! This is the first time this happened. It was awesome. :)

Things looking up?

It's been a busy week for Becky.

Monday: Work from 10am to 6pm. Then hung out with Meggan til about 8:30pm.
Tuesday: Dr. Appointment 11pm, Work 3:30pm to 5:30pm, drive to parents.
Wednesday: Lunch w/January and Mom, hung out with Amy, went back to seattle to meet my sister at 6pm, and her and Gavyn stayed the night at my place.
Thursday: up at 8am because of Gavyn (once he's up, everyone else is up), work 11am to 5:30pm
Friday: up at 7am, Interview at 9am, hung out with sister and Gavyn, work at 2:45pm to 4:45pm, and Paynes house from 7pm, for Monk, until now.
Tomorrow: up at 8am, work 9:45am to 12:15pm, hang out with Adrienne at 4pm.
Sunday: up at 8am, church 9am, Jen Bach's shower 1pm, and who knows what else.

I'm tired, hot... but not complaining. It's been a fun week. Next week won't be as busy, though. At least that I know of for now. :)

Anyway, I had an interview today. I interviewed at Gavyn's daycare and it was a great interview! The problem is... there are two types of positions I could be. One, associate teacher, and two, floater teacher. The only associate teacher position that is open at the center is in my nephew's classroom. For obvious reasons, I can't have this position. The floater teacher position... teacher that floats around to the different classrooms that need extra help for the day... the center needs them, but they don't know if they can afford another one. Yeah, I don't understand either. The good news in all of this is there are many other centers that I could work at, and they said they would refer me to another if they can't get me in at this center. Things looking up? I think so. :)

I determined today, after from talking with a friend, I should journal, privately, more. I just wish I wasn't too lazy to do it.

It's hot... I hope I can sleep.

Wow - Olympics #2

Watching gymnastics right now. Team USA is doing awesome! Two of the guys made no mistakes on the high bar, and they both stuck their landings (I wasn't paying attention to the other guys... haha). I am proud to say that I'm an American... and I know that's shallow, but there are other reasons too. :)

Wow - Olympics

The Men's Relay was amazing. They won by .08 of a second. I wanted to cry because it was such a glorious moment for them! They were sooo excited.

Sunday 'n stuff

It's Sunday, and I'm hanging out by myself. It's actually kinda nice since I've been so busy lately, and I'll be busy this next week too. There are a few minor things that I'm able to get done. Vacuum the apt... *needed* to be done. Organizing some stuff... one of my favorite things to do. Doing some research on various things. ie cat diets.

I am now through all the seasons of Monk. Sad, but the new season is out, and I still have a couple more books to go. :) Now I can move on to finishing ER. I'm on 4 out of the 7 seasons I have.

The Olympics are on... basically because nothing else is on. I guess I could put in a movie or watch some ER. Hmm.

So, the past couple weeks, I've been introduced to a few movies/tv shows.
~ Star Wars (already wrote about)
~ Remember Wenn - actually I was introduced to this a couple month ago, but been watching it more the past couple weeks
~ The Princes Bride - yes, this was my first time seeing it.
~ Mission Impossible, TV show in the 1960's/1970's

Jen comes back this Thursday! It's been great hanging out with her sister though. She's the avid Mission Impossible fan. After the church service today, she wanted to talk to the pastor linking a some reference from Mission Impossible and his sermon. I've only seen one episode. After she was done talking to him, I introduced myself and told him "I'm friends with her." He asked, "Are you old enough to be hanging out with her?" She's exactly 7 months older than me. Neither one of us look our age... I guess he thought she was older than she was because she talked about a 1960's TV show. I told Meggan about his comment, and her response was, "How old does he think I am?!"

Dinner calls me!

Dishes are washed/put in the washer... *needed* to be done. Now it's off to The Payne's for probably games and Monk night. Yahoo! :)

18 lbs of love

Took Chloe to the vet this morning. Had her weighed and as the title indicated, she weighs 18 lbs. She gained 2 lbs from last year. Heavy cat. Her plus the carrier equals a workout. Speaking of carrier, it was fun trying to get her into it. It took me about 10 mins. She may be big, but she's strong and fast. At any rate, she needs to be on an all can diet. Higher protein and fiber, and less in carbs. Also, more expensive. Oh well. She's worth it. :)

August

August seems to be a lonely month for the beckster. I have 4 friends moving away this month (two of them are married to each other). Another friend escaped to Yakima for the month. And, I have a friend who is in Beijing, China for the start of the Olympics for the first couple weeks of August... how dare she? :P Most of my other friends are out of town or out of state. So, I need to make some more friends. I've finally found a church that I'm happy with, thanks to Jen. :) I'm hoping to get involved in there singles group and possible join a small bible study. There's a group going to the Jars of Clay concert on August 24th, so maybe I'll end up going to that. I'm excited about this. I hope God helps me to be strong to do this.

So, I wanted to go watch the Blue Angels this weekend. I didn't want to go alone, but I couldn't figure out who I could ask to go with. I saw them with Marcie a couple years ago and thought they were absolutely amazing. Maybe next year...

This last Sunday was awesome. Jen is out of the country, so I got in touch with her sister, Meggan, for us to sit together at church. After church, Meggan asked me, "So you coming over?" I could be wrong, but it felt like the question was asked as if it was assumed I was coming over... which isn't that surprising given the fact that I've been coming over on Sundays since I started attending Jen's church. I just REALLY hate assuming things. Anyway, Meggan and I played Phase 10 and Trouble. She's trying to teach me how to be ruthless when it comes to game playing. It might actually turn out to be a life lesson... We also played Backgammon. She was less competitive with me on this game, since it was only my second time playing. I think I'm starting to catch on. After lunch, we headed to the neighborhood pool to sit out in the sun and watch there oldest sister and her family swim. They have a 2 and 3 year old who are very, very cute. :)

So, that was my Sunday. I'll update on my morning in another post... lets just say I had a Becky moment. Ha.

I'm tired

Yes, I'm tired. I went to bed last night at about 11:30. I woke up at 2:30am, because I had to pee. Went back to bed. Woke up at 7am because I had to pee again. I didn't go straight back to bed because "I wasn't tired". After reading for about an hour, I started getting tired again... and I had to be up by 9am.

Part of my tiredness has been cuz I've been pretty busy. A couple weekends ago, I was house sitting for an awesome family's dog. It made me realize that I want a dog. If I had the time, space, and money, I would get one. I love Chloe, but I think dogs provide more of a companionship. Anyway, this pass weekend, I went home (my parents). My mom got back from Disneyworld (don't get me started), and I wanted to visit with some friends who are moving about the middle of this next month. I've also been spending a good amount of my time hanging out with Jen and also her sister, Meggan.

Meggan made me watch the original starwars trilogy for the first time in my life. Luke pissed me off and Hans Solo was my favorite. C3PO was pretty awesome too, but I lost interest in him in the third movie. Obi-Wan Kenobi and Yoda are legends. I was not surprised about Vader being Luke's father. The cat was already out of the bag there. I was, however, surprised to find out that Luke and Leia were siblings. How cute, Luke and Leia... both "L" names, though I realize they are twins. Whatever. They were alright movies. I am glad that Vader/Anakin came through in the end. Nothing deep and meaningful came out of them... for me at least. They provided more of an entertainment value... and what I mean is, I'll be making fun of them for the rest of my life. :)

I'm still addicted to Monk. I've read 3 of 6 books, and working on the 4th. I'll be updating more about them later.

HA!

COURT SETS ATHEIST HOLIDAY

In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.
The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared, 'Case dismissed!'
The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, 'Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah...yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!'
The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, 'Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate his own atheists' holiday!'
The lawyer pompously said, 'Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?'
The judge said, 'Well it comes every year on exactly the same date---April 1st! Since our calendar sets April 1st as 'April Fools Day,' consider that Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture , he is a fool, and April 1st is his holiday! Now have a good day and get out of my courtroom!!
Way to go, Judge

My sister's brilliant plan...

My sister called me the other day. Her first line was, "Brent has your life all figured out!" Oh, does he now. See they live in south tacoma and my sister commutes to Renton everyday for work, which is at least, a half an hour. I guess this is getting to be too much for her, so their solution is: "I move down to Renton. Rent a two bedroom apartment. Rent out the second bedroom to her and Gavyn so they can stay there during the week and they would go home on the weekends." My sister is really pushing for this... she's sending me apartment ads and telling me I could get a job at Gavyn's daycare... there are 15 positions open, apparently.

Sigh... help?

Bad news turned into Good

That's right! My car had mercy on me, for some reason, and gave me my key back!

The Good News and the Bad

The good news... I'm housing for my boss. My boss is my friend Andrews dad. It's kinda a weird relationship, but cool at the same time.

Anyway, at this house that I'm staying at, there's a very cute, huge black lab (and probably something else). Rockie is his name, and he's very friendly. Rockie is prone to seizures, so I have to give him a pill twice a day. I was very scared of this when they showed me how to do it. However I tried it tonight and I was successful! It's not as scary as I thought. It's a little gross, because you kinda have to stick your hand down his throat.

There is a baby grand, and I'm allowed to play with it. :) I don't play much or, by any means, well, but I do like to fiddle around with a keyboard/piano ever now and then. It's wonderful, and very pretty.

And, because they're up on a hill, there is this wonderful view of the mountains... through the trees. I'm currently watching the sun set. :)

The bad news... my car is broke. Not really... but my key is stuck in the ignition and it won't come out. I tried to get it out. Matt tried to get it out. Jen tried to get it out. None of us were successful. It's rather irritating. Especially every time I open up the door, there's the obnoxious dinging sound... because the key is stuck in the ignition. The car turns off. The car starts just fine. But, again, the key is stuck in the ignition. Grr. I hope they will give me a rental car for when I take it in.

Now it's back to petting the dog. :)

Monk and my cat

I have a confession... I'm addicted to Monk. It's really pathetic. I'm watching the show. Watch seasons 1, 2, 3, and 4. Now I'm working on 5. Six is soon to come. Seventh season is now on USA... I really don't know what I'll do when I'm finished with the 6th season, and all I have is the 7th... and I'm told that the seasons only last for a few weeks, then stop for several weeks, and starts back up for a few more weeks.

I should also mention, I've discovered there are Monk books. They do a pretty good job at portraying the characters, and they actually mention some of the episodes. They are pretty funny and entertaining. Though it's sad that I some times confuse which were actual episodes and what actually was in the books. Haha. But it's all fun. :)

Um, so my cats in trouble. She bit me again tonight. Though, not as bad as last time. She's currently locked in the bathroom. I might keep her in there for the night, but I'm not sure I want to be that cruel.

Friday/Saturday/Sunday

My weekend has been great.

Friday: I hung out with Jen. We went to Discovery Park long enough to find the visitor center and purchase a map. That was because we were scheduled to meet Danielle at the UW med center at 4pm. That awesome part of meeting Danielle was she had the assignment of being in a wheelchair for 24 hours. For this assignment, she was instructed to be out in a public place for awhile. So we decided to go to dinner at the Spaghetti Factory in Lynnwood, and then to see Kung Fu Panda. Dinner was great. I love Italian food! The movie... well, it was good for a few laughs. :)

Saturday: I met up Adrienne at the U-village for some coffee at 10:30am. Then at 12pm we met Denise at Red Robin, Northgate for some lunch. After lunch we walked the mall for a bit, where Adrienne bought a very cute summer dress. At 1:45pm, we had appointments at InSpa, U-village, for a manicure (Adrienne) and pedicures (Denise and I). We were celebrating Denise's birthday with a girls day out. It was a very fun morning/afternoon. :) The rest of the day was spent at Denise's apartment containing Dr. Mario, which I rocked at, watching TV, eating delicious ice cream, and ordering in pizza. It was also a very fun evening.

Sunday: I went to church, and I feel bad saying this, but it was a terrible service. I may write about it later. After church, I went over to Jen's house to have lunch with her family. Then we headed over to my place to watch Monk and read the first 2 chapters of Mere Christianity. Now I'm watching more Monk :P, and will be heading to bed after the episode is done.

Bad kitty

I was brushing my cat last night and about another cat came off of her. Anyway, after a while, she had enough and decide to bite me. Hard. Now I'm going to the doctor to get a tetanus shot... and maybe an antibiotic. Lesson: pick up on the clues that kitty is done with the brushing.

I was driving today and I saw a van of a plumbing company with the mascot "Poppy the plunger".

The good

Well, my bathroom is now back is presenting order. I'm embarrassed to admit this, but it hasn't been cleaned in over 2 months. To my defense, I was sick about a month out of the 2 months.

Not much going on with me. I bowled Monday night. I actually bowled quite well. Bowled my highest game... 145! That was the game I bowl like 3 or 4 strikes in a row. It was great fun.

Work is going well... bad news, it ends next Wednesday. I'll be sad to see these kids go. I've loved working with these kids and remember them forever. I've learned a lot from this experience. I want to work with kids, and I'm considering going into education... maybe school psychology, or even, teaching. We'll see where God leads me.

Lastly (for tonight :P), there is a series of Monk books! I've picked up one today called "Mr. Monk and the Two Assistants". It's really awesome because this book has both of Monk's assistants, ex- and present, and there is a bit of a competition for Monks attention. It'll be great!

Off to read...

My 4th of July weekend

My weekend was great.

The 4th, I spent most of the day with Jen. I went over early to help bake an apple pie. Despite the crust dough being irritating because it was not doing what we wanted it to do, the pie turned out excellent. After around of yatzee, and an episode of Monk and Remember Wenn, the rest of the group came over... about 5pm. We all had dinner, played apples to apples, and watch about 5 firework shows going on around Jen's neighborhood. It was great. One of the best 4th of Julys I've had.

Saturday I went to a family BBQ. It was at my sister's parents-in-laws, who are very nice people. They had burgers, salmon, several types of salads, bake beans... all very yummy. They also had berry cheesecake and caramel apple pie. Oh, I was in heaven. While my mother was somewhat irritating, it was good to see my parents. My nephew is the greatest kid ever. He like to play peek-a-boo. It's so great when he cracks up laughing. My favorite part, though, was the golden retriever they had. It brought back memories of the one we used to have. :)

Sunday was church and then a Mariners game with Jen. It was a great game, even though we lost. 15 innings of fun! There was even a 14th inning stretch. LOL. Of course, the best part was hanging out with a great friend. After the game, we went back to Jen's house. Had a bratwurst... so much better than hot dogs. Then we introduced her family to apples to apples. Just to warn you all... if you play against a family you are not apart of, especially if they are close, you might loss miserably. I still had fun though.

I hope you all had a great weekend too!

This 'n that

If there is one thing in this world that makes me happy, it's Monk... the TV show. My good friend, Jen, introduced me to this wonderful show and is loaning me all the seasons. She has all 5 seasons and will be getting the 6th season when it comes out soon. When I'm making more money... ha... I might have to break down and buy them too. :)

Work is going well. I love the kids. Definitely and improvement from the AAA. :) I work with a cutey, pa-tutey. Brendan. We play and joke around, it's so much fun. This tutoring experience has made me realize I really want to work with kids. My job search focus is now preschools around the seattle area. This is actually a prayer request... that God will bring me work and lead me to the place that He wants me to be at. Anyway, tutoring reading is alright. It has nothing do with the program. It's excellent, actually. It a matter of preference... which is math for me. :P

Oh yes, I almost forgot. GO SEE WALL-E! Oh my goodness, I saw it twice this past weekend, it's that good. I would probably see it again... so if anyone is interested, let me know. :P

can someone explain to me how my forehead got burnt when I was sitting in the shade with sunscreen on?

I feel awkward social situations. Part of that is I'm not a very good conversationalist. The other part is I just don't know how to put myself out there.

I was at Gianna's birthday party tonight. She just turned one! It was a lot of fun. Bunch of friends there I got to see that I only see like once a year. This part was fun... I'm usually okay in big groups, because there are other people around to lead the conversation. Ha. The part that was awkward for me was as people were getting ready to leave, there was talk of people going to see a movie. One of my friends was on the fence of whether to go, but decided not too. I was interested in going, but with out my friend I would have been the only girl with 2 married men and a single guy... none of which I actually hung out with besides a large group setting. This may not seem that big of a deal... though none of them asked if I wanted to go and I didn't want to just invite myself to go. I'm horrible with these things.

---

I'm starting to feel better, finally. It was nice to get a full night sleep last night. Hopefully, I'll be close to normal by Monday.

ER visit #2

Yeah, I landed in the ER again. Asthma... great fun. I started having problems on saturday, it kind of hit me all of a sudden. Luckily, on saturday, I was around a friend who had a nebulizer. That saved my life until about monday afternoon. I was with Erin, and I texted the friend who saved my life and told her I wasn't breathing very well again. She told me to go into the hospital. So... I told Erin, and she graciously took me to the ER. Matt met us there. He was there for my last ER visit, and I wanted him there because he knew what went on my last visit since I don't remember any of it. Anyway, they gave me some steroids, coughing treatments, and an IV of more steroids. That hurt like h*ll, btw. Then they sent me home even though I wasn't feeling that much better.

Erin stayed the night, and I went to work the next day (tuesday). I had too. There are no sub tutors. I hung out with Jen tuesday night, and went to work on wednesday (yesterday). Should mention that I worked for 8 1/2 hours yesterday? I was called into the renton center. It would have been fine because I was only scheduled to work 2 hours... but they asked me to stay and extra 2 1/2 hours. I really have a hard time say no. So I said yes, which was not smart on my part. I went over to Jen's after work and we had some awesome, yummy pizza. I started having problems again, so Jen took me to Denise and Andrew where I stayed the night. Yes, I went to work again today. Again, no sub tutors.

I'm still not doing that much better. I had a doctors appointment today. They gave me a treatment, sent me home with an antibiotic, and a prescription for rental nebulizer. At this point in time, I'm hanging out with Danielle and waiting for my nebulizer to come. I really hope it comes soon, because again, I'm not doing that well.

I'm going to go lay down now.

It was a good fathers day for my dad. If there's one thing my dad likes, it's having my sister and I home. I got up on Sunday, and he asked if he could make me waffles. I wasn't going to say no. Haha. They were very good waffles too. :) After breakfast, we went bowling. Spending quality time with each other is almost unheard of in my family. It was really fun though. We played 3 game. It was a fathers day special that dads get to bowl 3 games for free. My dad and I both agreed that we should have stopped after 2 games. I did well my first two games, but tanked the last game. My dad was having back problems after the 2nd game and 3 games over did it for him... poor guy. Later that evening, we met up with my sister and her family and went out to dinner. We ate at this awesome Japanese restaurant that was very yummy. My sister had all different kinds of sushi. One was octopus... I'm not as daring as she is. I'm not a big fan of seafood anyway.

It's going to be a busy week for me. Tonight I had bowling... which I did really, really bad, btw. Tomorrow, I need to do a bunch of cleaning in my apartment. It's terrible. Wednesday is when the students that I'll be tutoring will be tested so we know what level to start them off on. Thursday, I'll be heading over to my parents again to help with my mother's dance recitals. I'll be there until Sunday... let me tell you, it'll be loads of fun. It's money though. Then I start tutoring on Monday... yay for being busy!

So that's my week. I may get around to posting again this week. I don't know... we'll see.

Sicky

I'm sick... bleck. I went to the doctor. Told me to take Sudafed and gave me a prescription nose spray. This treatment was actually more than I expected to get. The problem now is I'm starting to cough. If you don't know my history, let me say that this is bad. I have asthma that is triggered by allergies, sports, and being sick. When I start coughing, it's pretty much a guarantee it'll "turn on my asthma". If I don't get this cough under control, I could end up in the ER again. So I'm going to the asthma/allergist tomorrow. My cough has worsen over the day... that's partly has to do with I'm stubborn and don't like to stay in one place for long periods of time. Ha. I need to get my prescriptions refilled from the last time I was sick... about a year and a half ago. Usually if it's over a year, they want to check up with you.

My cat is so cute. She's sitting next to me sleeping. I want to snuggle with her... but she wouldn't like that. Darn un-snuggling cat.

Costas - Greg is the Man!

Yes, two posts in one day... as I said in my last post, I'm sick, so I have a lot of free time.

Yes, I promised an update of costas. So friday night was UCF's end of the year celebration at Costas. The other thing that was being celebrated was it's Greg's 10 year anniversary with UCF. Angie, his wife, had emailed a bunch of former UCFers asking for some inspiring thought of Greg, and to invite us all to Costas... which was a big surprise to Greg. It was kind of funny. Ron was making a speech, and it started with, "so Greg is probably wondering why we're all here..." Greg's parents, Angie, Gianna, brother, and nephew all came... so yeah, this was quite the celebration.

The part that was so awesome was all the people that showed up. Some people that I haven't seen in over 2 years! The list of people: Ron, Dan Segars, Paul, David Knaggs, Matt Halpin (and his sister), Jen P, Dan Ahn, Jessica, Vimal, (a couple of newbies that I don't know), Barbra, Amber and Andrew, Chad and Megan, Jae, Matt Jones, Dan and Stacey, KC and Hilary, Casey and her husband, Becky and Sean, Levi, and Niko! I hope I'm not forgetting anyone... Anyway, it was so much fun seeing and getting reacquainted with everyone! I stayed at Costas until 11:30pm.

Another awesome thing was... Niko being our waiter, we got HUGE discounts on everything. We got free drinks. We got free flaming cheese (per table). We got free desert, and free coffee to go with that. Because Niko was lazy, he rounded our bills down to the nearest dollar. So when my bill was probably about 18 dollars, it ended up being 10 dollars. I heard somewhere he made about 100 dollars in tips.

It was so awesome. You all should be jealous of me. :)

I'm sick. I have some sinus thing going on... not fun. Anyway, I was at the library today on the computer doing the job searching thing. There was this guy sitting next to me that I was having a sniffling competition with. I think he was winning, because he was getting his throat into it. Nasty.

why am I so tired? I really have no reason to be. Maybe I'm getting sick... I don't feel sick though. hmm.

I have a couple things I want to write, but I'm too tired, so I'll save them for next time.
One, is the night at costas.
Two, is thoughts on my weekend.

I'm sure there is more, but stay tuned for these posts.

My Day

So it's been an eventful day. This morning I woke up too early... I've been getting a knot in my stomach every time I wake up due to stress... anyway, Jen came over at 11am and we headed down to downtown seattle to the aquarium. It was pretty fun, and my favorite was the sea otters. The were sooo cute! Too bad I don't have a picture of them! Right... after the aquarium, we went up to pikes place market and walking around for about 45 mins. Not long enough... we decided we're going back some other time. After the market, we headed back to my house and watched an episode of cosby and an episode of monk. Both great show, btw.

During the TV watching, Adrienne texted me and asked if I wanted to meet with her for coffee. I said yes, of course, and we meet up at 7pm. We walked around the U-village a bit, then decided to go to Target (northgate) because she needed to get a baby gift for the baby shower she's going to tomorrow. After that, she was hungry... I asked if she's ever been to the california pizza kitchen, which is right across the street from target (in the mall). She said no... and I said, "we're going."

So now I'm full with pizza and tired. I think I'll go to bed. ;)

Moving on

It is hard doing things for the last time. For example, it was really hard to graduate from UCF. It needed to be done though. Everyone had moved on and UCF is a college group. Doesn't mean that I still don't have connections, memories, and friends. but it means that a chapter has closed in my life. The reason why it was so hard is because I didn't really have anything to move on too. I'm really working on that though... finding a job, figuring out where I should meet some new friends, etc. It's just hard. Really hard. I don't want things to change, but thing are changing right from under me and there's nothing I can do to stop it. The more I deny the changes, the harder it is. So yeah, I need to stop denying it and except it. Again, it's so hard.

I almost feel like I should move somewhere. I've had friends move to chicago, canada, idaho, california, bellingham, florida, arkanasas, oregon, yakima, shelton, japan... and now, I have a couple friends leaving soon for montana, princeston, spokane, tennessee, and texas. I guess this is what happens when people graduate college. I just haven't figured that out yet.... so I feel like I should be moving away. Not sure that's the right answer, but it's the thing to do! I'm still waiting for the fact that 'I can do what ever I want' to set in. What do I want to do with my life?... that is the question that I've been trying to figure out since I graduated HS. I've been told that I'm young and I don't have to have it all figure out yet. However, I'm not going to be young forever, and I'm certainly not getting any younger... thus more pressure on myself. I need to take it easy...

Tomorrow's Friday. This week has gone by fast. I have a busy weekend. Tomorrow, I hope to hang out with Matty. At some point hook up with Jen and Adrienne... and maybe head over to Golden Gardens for the annual UCF BBQ bash. For those who don't know, UCF which stand for University Christian Fellowship, which is the fellowship I belong to when I went to UW.

Saturday, I'm going over to the peninsula with Adrienne (?) for a friends birthday.

Then Sunday, I'm going to church with Jen. Some well known (ha) person is teaching on apologetics. After that, I'll probably be hanging out with Jen. Depending on how long we hang out, I might be going to a young adult dinner thing for the church I started going to.

Well about that. I might be looking for a new church. I love the young adult group, but I hate the services... or I should say, I hate the prayer time. Is that okay to say? All they seem to pray about is the sick and death. Where is the joy that God brings to people? Seriously.

Yeah, I've been blogging a lot, but that's because it give me something to do. It's also an outlet. I don't think that anything I say here is all that important. It's just a way for me to get out frustrations, joys, inspirations, revelations, etc. I do thank the few who read and sometimes respond to this.

War! What is it good for...

(Ashley, that headline is for you. :) )

Goodness gracious... tutoring ending today. This was for a company called Knowledge Points and our location was at the African America Academy in South Seattle on Beacon Hill. I got involved because a good friend of mine dad owns this company... at least for this region of the state. I think he has a center opening up down in tacoma now. Anyway, I thought it was a really good experience... though one of the other tutors had a difference in opinion.

Her name was Tatyana (sp? she's russian). She could not handle the disrespect from the kids. She couldn't handle there rambunctiousness. They're 6th graders. After the kids left today, she gave Nancy (the other tutor) the speech of "It's our fault that the kids were behaving so badly." That, "We should have been more hard on them from the beginning." And a bunch of other things, that I believe was garbage. Nancy had explained to her, many times, that we did not have the support of the administration. For instance, two of the kids started to fighting one day, and the administrations had done nothing to help us out... they just left us to deal with it, but that is not our jobs. Nancy also pointed out that we have no idea where these kids are coming from. Broken homes? Stable homes? Who knows.

We had 3 consistent students. Taylor, Jazzmine (sp?), and Jamiko. I'll be honest, I didn't like Taylor. If there was something that she didn't know how to do, she refused to work for anybody. She was so stubborn and hard headed, she was not pleasant to work with. Jazzmine... is the one that I worked with most of the time. She was a very hard worker and was excited to learn. The problem with her was she's an instigator. The kids had a habit of bickering and sometimes fighting with each other, and most of the time she started it. Jamiko is all around a good kid. He's very smart and was also a very hard worker. He was a character and very funny... but he LOVES the attention. That made it hard for him to stay focus. Out of the three, I would have to say that Jamiko was my favorite. :P

Anyway, I enjoyed this experience despite all the chaos. I enjoyed working with both the tutors and all 3 of the children. Would I do it again? Yes... if I had the same help I did, but honestly, they wouldn't come back. I understand why. Things could have been a lot better. We could have had more support from the administration, which again, was the biggest problem.

So, I might have a chance of tutoring this summer... which I really hope I can. Not sure what the conditions are yet, but I'll let everyone know when I know more. :)

phone

I'm getting a new phone. The deal is my old phone broke... 3 times. The first time, I could call people, they could receive my call, but they couldn't hear me. I could hear them, but they couldn't hear me. Something was up with the mouth piece or something. This happened a second time. The third time, I get this irritating buzzing noise every time I talk to someone. Thus, I'm getting a new phone... new model, new everything. And I should mention the phone will be pink. :) I'm very excited about this. I never thought I'd get a pink phone but I decide to go with is since the choices were between pink... and black. To some, black may seem okay... but to me, it seems boring. So, pink it is. Below is the link to the phone I'll be getting. I'd just thought I'd share with the rest of the world. :)

http://www.sonyericsson.com/cws/products/mobilephones/seethephone/z310a?cc=us&lc=en

So I think I figured out a way to help me relax in this whole job searching thing. My plan is to get up in the morning. Eventually make my way to the library. Spend a couple of hours there researching jobs and applying to 2 - 3 jobs per day. Then leave the library and be done with thinking about job stuff for the rest of the day. The idea behind this is to have my apartment be a place of rest, and not a place of stress and worry.

I'm going to try this out and hoping it works. I'm consumed with thinking about a job 24/7 (and I'm not joking)... I eat, sleep, breathe job stuff. And it's pretty much all I write about here. I'm not allowing myself to have fun in life. All my conversations revolve around the stress of finding a job. People (my parents, mainly) are figuring out to not ask about how it's going, because I might "snap" emotionally. It's terrible and I realize this... so yeah, I'm hoping this works.

Anyway, Denise and Andrew are wonderful people. They got me an early, early birthday present. A bowling ball and bowling shoes. :) I was SO happy when they gave it to me. See, we're on a bowling league for about another couple months, and they wanted me to have my own ball for this. I'm so excited. They did a good job picking out the ball... it's purple with sparkles. :) I'm also glad to have my own bowling shoes. I no longer have to wonder whose feet has been in the shoes that I'm wearing. I can't wait to test it out in league! I'm hope to continue with bowling after they leave.

Plans for tomorrow... library, interview with another temp agency (which probably won't come through because I bombed there skills test thing-y), and it's a friends birthday. I might be hanging out with them in the evening, but who knows.

Repeat after me...

I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.
I will not play fortuneteller.

Yeah, I should go on, but I think that may be enough for the blog.

AW emailed me. Must email him back. But I have to go swimming first. Oh what fun.

Anxiety

So, I've let anxiety get the best of me lately. Here's how it goes... I wake up in the morning with this big knot in my stomach. It takes every ounce of me to get out of bed and tackle the day. The reason of this is because I know that I have to do something in the way of job searching. As known, this is something I have great anxiety over. I have the tendency of "predicting" the future, which often isn't true. I get anxious over the interview, over accepting a job, over making it to work on time, over getting along with my co-workers, over succeeding at the job at hand... you get the picture. On thing that I'm being told and have to constantly remind myself is to "live in the moment". I'll cross those bridges when they come up. Being told this help... a lot, but it the telling myself over and over again that's the hard part. I fail at it, actually.

One thing that has come up is at interview for a staffing agency, Pace Staffing. They wanted me to do this skills survey, asking questions such as "Is lying acceptable? Agree or disagree?" (Erin had a good one, but I can't remember what it is...) Anyway, given your answers, they broke it up into different categories... trustworthy, assertive, etc. I don't remember what they were, but what I do know is I score low to below average on most of them. This can not be good. They're not going to want to sent me out to work with their clients. Ug, why do we have to take those stupid tests?

So, I'm here and alive. I've been applying to jobs... 10 today. I'm scared out of my mind, but I have to remind myself to take it one day at a time.

I had to do one of the hardest things in my life the other day. Stand up to my dad. See, I've been looking for a job and he wants to help me. By help, I mean do it for me. I had to tell him that I need to do this myself... that I appreciate his help, but I need to feel in control. This was SOOO hard. I think it hurt him as much as it hurt me. It was as if I was saying, "your little girl doesn't need you any more." I think I cried for awhile after that.

Anyway, I'm on a bowling league. I seem to do better in the first game, and tank in the last two games. I have an average of 99. I hope I can live up to it next week...

I have a busy day tomorrow. Two meetings, work, and swimming. It's going to go by fast.

Hmm...

So something that I'm trying to learn is... I'm an adult and I can do whatever I want. I don't know why but this is particularly a hard concept for me to grasp. I think it might have to do with my mother undermining me pretty much my whole life. She pretty much made all decisions for me and made me do things I didn't want to do... and more importantly, didn't allow me to chose things I wanted to do. I don't mean to make her sounds like a bad mother. She did the best she could with what she had... no one is perfect.

I've been told that "I'm stronger than I think I am" by many people. I didn't understand this until recently. I need to learn to have faith in myself... it's so hard. I need to realize that I'm capable of making my own decisions... again, also very hard. I need to not be afraid of screwing up. I'm human and as I pointed out above, no one is perfect. My counselor told me that there's always a solution... which my fear has been there's not.

I'm making progress on looking for a job. I've posted my resume on two job websites. I've applied to a few jobs, and I have an interview with a temp agency on Monday. I'm rather anxious about all of this, but I believe that getting a job with help with some of the above. It'll give me money so I can feel free to do things I want to do... without asking for permission. I just hope that I lead a more interesting life after this all happens, because right now, my life is pretty dead.

Anyway, there's some of my refections for now. I'll post more soon, I'm sure. :)

My friend Erin

Anyway, things I learned while Erin was here:
1. I need to go outside more.
2. I need to walk more.
3. I need to get up earlier.
4. I should hang out with Barbara more... before she goes.
5. I learned a lot about Erin. :)
6. Being silent is okay... though sometimes I felt like I was too silent. Anyway.
7. I miss having a roomate.

Friends are wonderful. Especially Danielle. That's all I got to say about that.

what's new...

Well, I've seem to have forgotten about my blog. That partly has to do with that I don't have a lot to say... but really, that's a lie. I just don't know how to say what I want to say. There are so many questions that need to be answered... it's how to answer them is the problem.

The major thing that I'm struggling with is getting a job. I want a job... but I fear the independence. I fear me not being able to support myself. I'm afraid of making the wrong decision. I'm afraid of getting in a situation that I can't get out of. These are all paralyzing me. I'm not moving or growing. I want to move. I want to grow. I want a job... The question is how do I set aside my anxiety?

In other news... Erin is staying with me this week. I've been the most active this week than I have in along time. It's been good for me. We've walked around greenlake, hung out with some people, watch a few movies, ate with some people, walked around ballard, went to see the tulips, went to bellingham, and went to whidbey island. All have been fun but my most favorite was today, the whidbey island trip. We drove around the island, ate at this cute little farm house place. Drove some more to oak harbor. Then we heading off to deception pass. There we sat looking at this wonderful scenic view for about 3 hours. The sun was out... there was great conversation. Neither one of us wanted to go! But alas, we brought ourselves to leave... and here I am writing about the trip. :)

Well, I'll try to be better at updating this thing. I'm not sure I can promise that, but I'll try. It might take a bit of encouragement. ;)